To my little Westley

My little Westley. The peace in a world of chaos. 

With my first babies I could see how the long days were changing me. I might have grown the baby but the babies were also growing a mother, day by day. I learned so much. I stretched. I struggled. I changed. 

And the changing is still happening, to be sure. But Westley seems to do more reminding than he does teaching – or maybe it is teaching – teaching me to slow down, reminding me to sit in this moment, to smile at this baby, to just lie on the floor and be. He reminds me to dance in the kitchen, to snuggle on the couch, and play on the rug. Right now the other kids ask for me to make dinner, to set up a new toy, to take them to the park… and Westley just smiles and bounces, and gently reminds me that food + sleep + comfort are what we all really need. 

Some of my babies have done a lot of demanding. And the demanding taught me something. With Westley is is more of a whisper, “You know this, Mom, I know you do. Slow down and live it. And feel it. And love it. ” 

I think we are done with babies (which is simultaneously exciting and tragic). And so I am extra grateful for his gentle reminders. 

I love you, sweet Westley. I love you for who you are, and who you are reminding me to be. 

P.S. Nights with this one are another thing entirely. But they are getting much better. And somehow it matters less than I thought it would (it matters less and is still all consuming?). 

 

photos taken at 6.5 months, pre-pandemic. 

Westley’s one piece (the softest! I bought it in two colors and he’ll live in these when the weather is warmer…right now he’s wearing them with sweaters) 

my sneakers // my sweater  

 

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