The Hardest Thing About Being Married

Sometimes I get frustrated. Often I’m not the person I expect myself to be. Occasionally I’m just not very nice. More frequently than I would like, I’m selfish.

But no matter how the day goes, or any struggle we have at night, I wake up to hugs and kisses, in the arms of a loving husband who is trying his best. He tells me he loves me and then he gets up and makes me french toast with boysenberry syrup and whipped cream because I didn’t want cereal (or maybe thats just this morning).

The hardest thing about being married is you aren’t living for yourself. When I’m grumpy I can’t just choose to let myself be grumpy and think I’m only hurting myself. I can’t mope about a bad test or a long day without effecting someone I love. Sometimes I really don’t like that. I want to be tired or sad or frustrated until I’m not anymore. But it isn’t about me – its about him, and Him, and us. And when its about me, its about being a better me, a me that doesn’t need to wallow in self pity and who is much happier when he’s happy. Its about a me who is excited to be changing and growing and progressing.  Its about a me who is happier than I ever imagined.

So the hardest thing about being married is that you aren’t living for yourself, but its the best thing about being married too.

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16 Comments

  1. so very well-said. 🙂 Getting off my selfish butt right now to go make dinner.

  2. Ohhh you are NOT alone!! I feel the exact same way…

  3. Amen! I agree with everything. In my opinion, the number one importance to your marriage is selflessness.

  4. First off…love this photo shoot of you and your sweetie.

    Secondly…I totally agree…it's all about being selfless!

  5. well put. I have had the same feeling but never thought of how to put it into words, and you totally just did. 🙂 also, french toast with boysenberry syrup sounds incredible!

  6. You are so wise. Selfishness ruins so many marriages. If both partners always put the other person's happiness before their own…wow…the kind of marriage you could have. But it is so hard. Thank you for your insightful post.

  7. You guys are such an adorable couple! I admire the relationship that you have!

  8. I completely agree…living for yourself is so much easier, but it's way more fulfilling (and a HUGE growth opportunity) to share life. PS: I'm insanely jealous of all the cute pictures you two have. Do you have a professional photographer friend? Or are you just that photogenic?

  9. you are so right…I've been almost a year with my b/F and since 3 o 4 months in we have been almost living together and now oficially we have moved to a studio together…ans it's so importan to remeber that you are not living just for yourself when you are comitted like that…and it's great!

    =)
    dailylivingingeneva.blogspot.com

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